Wednesday, August 26, 2009

In which I type and type and type and type. Feel no obligation to read and read and read and read

Thing the First:

I can never live alone. Twice in the last year I have spent several days alone, and it's not pretty. Without the presence of other human beings I lose all motivation. I do not get dressed. I do not shower. I let the dog sleep in my bed. (Cesar what's his head says you should never never never do that. The dog doesn't seem to mind.) I make plans with people and then change my mind because it is just so. much. work. to get up from whatever I'm knitting or reading or computer-ing and make myself presentable. I ignore the doorbell, resent the phone when it rings, and eat the most ridiculous combinations of food. (yesterday? cream cheese on melba toast followed by a tin of smoked oysters. Washed down with about a litre of Diet Coke. At 2 am. That was "supper".) Seriously. I'd go feral, whatever that looks like in a human. And then I'd get depressed because I was lonely because I am essentially an extrovert, it's just that I am gifted at self-sabotage.

And it's not like I do anything worthwhile on the computer either, unless you count finding a seriously hilarious blog and reading the entire two years worth of archives.

Thankfully other people live here, and will be coming home today, and with that in mind, I did accomplish a few things along the lines of tidying up and washing dishes and cleaning up the kitchen (which I totally did just last week, what's up with that??) and buying the last of A's needed school supplies and finding a place that will fix her backpack buckles because last year's's's' (hey, can't tell where to put the apostrophe. Didn't I mask that well?) backpack is PERFECTLY FINE except for the shattered buckle and I don't have a sewing machine that will handle sewing through that much webbed strapping.

Thing the Second

School starts tomorrow. I hate school. Stupid stupid school. Give me back my children, you tyrant.

Thing the Third

ACK fall is here. Must look up how to Act Like A Writer. Anybody have a good URL for that?

Thing the Fourth

My mother is getting better. I have spent so much of this being stoic and resigned and frustrated and heartbroken that I am almost completely unable to process the reality of that. They took her feeding tube out because she's eating all her meals by mouth now. Huh??? Old bedridden people don't get BETTER. Only, you know, she is.

Thing the Fifth

Wow was I a complete jerk to my husband on Sunday. I've already apologized to him and to the kids and possibly even the furniture, but as I was sitting up, too mad to sleep, snapping at him from the couch on Sunday night at midnight, I had this huge epiphany. What I was essentially doing was being furious with him for not having my personality, and then telling him that because he didn't have my personality, he couldn't possibly have one freaking clue what he was doing. I literally stopped midsentence and gaped at him, and let the profuse apologizing begin.

I'm very very very glad you don't have my personality, love. One of us bringing the crazy is more than enough, thank you very much.

Thing the Sixth

I got a parcel the other day and because our mailboxes are banks of vaulted metal dotted strategically around the neighbourhood, I had to get it out of the special bin for parcels too big to fit in my regular bin. The mailperson forgot to allow for the fact that there is a big ol' lock sticking out of the door of the mailbox and so I had to bash the box to bits to get it out. (or, you know, leave a kindly worded note and wait one whole day but ...see FERAL, above. I'm surprised I didn't try to knaw the lock off with my teeth.)

Thing the Seventh

TechnoGuy has this really cool geek toy that is a globe that sits on a stand but is full of magic so that it turns even though there's no plug. It does seem to need some light, though, and now that he's off backpacking through Kananaskis with the children and our buddy B, he's not in his office so much, and it's not working. So I'd just like to say:

You can come home now. The world just doesn't work the way it's supposed to when you're gone.


ccap said...

Nice little wrap-up!

Slow'n'Steady said...

I don't suppose, when you were tidying, that you found those converter plugs and the european flat iron???

Koala Bear Writer said...

That's good news about your mom. I like your last paragraph too. :)

Koala Bear Writer said...

And I wanted to say--but we like to read and read and read. :) That's why we drop by!

Kay Day said...

I say
You should homeschool. Thus you will NEVER be alone. All fear of feralness will be gone.
Also, you will have your kids back.
It's a great excuse for not writing. But you can say that you WANT to write. You know, if only you had time.

Carolyn said...

I get all that alone business...oh ya! Eventually it turns into something else, but I'm not sure what that is yet.

Colleen Taylor said...

Oh I laughed out loud sooooooo much! And then I sighed at the end.