Thursday, June 12, 2008

Perhaps it was the victorious fist pump that tipped them off

So I'm trying to write. A book, some poetry, whatever else comes to mind. You know - BE a writer. I'd love to quit my job and write but

1) I think that I am possibly the least self-disciplined person on the planet.

2) Way back when B was in kindergarten, this job dropped into my lap. Even though I wasn't looking for work on Friday, by Wednesday I was all dressed up and out among the people, earning money. I said at the time: "If I don't take this job, God might just have to come down and smack me over the head with a two by four, saying "Psst! Talking! To YOU!". So I didn't feel like I could just walk away without some sort of ...permission.

So for several months I've been praying for a clear signal that it's time to leave.

Yesterday morning I was laid off.

Fairly clear, I'd say.

I'm excited and nervous and oh my goodness do I not want to squander this marvelous opportunity.

(I'm pretty sure I didn't react the way my boss was expecting me to. He told me all about the terms and conditions and what I needed to sign, and asked if I had any questions.
"Are you telling me the truth when you say it's not performance based?" I asked.

"Absolutely."

I stuck out my hand.

"Then I'm good." I said. "Maybe I'll get that novel written in this life time after all."

And I went and packed up my desk and gave away all the MacDonald's toys sprinkled liberally over my desk and hugged everyone and said it had been fantastic working with them - and it has, it really has. The best thing about that job has always and forever been the people. The best group I have ever worked with, hands down.

And then I tried not to rub my hands in glee until after I'd left the building.)

Now I'm just scared :) but - Nancy, are you reading this? - so what?

This is who I am.

New stuff scares me.

But getting to be home with my kids for the summer? Not one bit scary. Not paying to park downtown? Not paying for the fuel to drive downtown and back 4 days a week? Not paying to buy lunches? All those things aren't new, so I'll be good :)

(why yes, there is a teeny black spot over there to the side, the fly in the ointment. Care to guess what it is? there will be no prize, but who cares?)

12 comments:

Kay said...

you have to clean your own house??

Megan DiMaria said...

Err, umm--so congratulations are in order?

That's not something I've ever said to someone who was laid off.

A prisoner of hope,
Megan

darien said...

um....so do you want to come to see Jack with me?

and

SO WHAT! :-)

flicka said...

Congratulations and I'm sorry. I hope it's an awesome summer and I KNOW you'll get that novel written. Otherwise I have some very hypocritical emails in my inbox that I need to send back to you. :-)

xxoo

Momstheword said...

A paycheck?

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, Susan, on your great attitude at this new development in your life. God is always working on us, isn't he? Best wishes, Clyde

Karen said...

I suppose there is this little thing called money, but Psalm 23 says "I shall not want"..and I notice it doesn't any anything about changing life circumstances. Interesting.

Here's to an amazing adventure,

Karen

The Koala Bear Writer said...

Been meaning to say congrats... this is exciting! Best of luck with the writing. I said I'd do more once I was finished work and at home with Sunshine... um, does a blog count? :) Have fun with your kids this summer!

Anonymous said...

here's sending you support for your writing!!!

a book that came into my hands via a rec from Christine Kane (www.christinekane.com -- her blog) has been one of THE best supports for writing I have ever come across-- fyi, if it is of use to you:

Writing Begins with the Breath by Laraine Herring

cheers, bluepoppy

Krista said...

So does this mean I have a chance to win your book one day?? :D

Angi said...

Ummm, no, I am the most undisciplined person on the face of the earth . . . .

Bonnie Grove said...

Ahh, I found you.

Not that you were hiding. I just didn't look before now.

After you clean your house....no, wait, make that BEFORE you clean your house, mosey over to my blog http://www.fictionmatters.blogspot.com, read what's going on there and then send me your article (you're the next contestant on The Price Is....I mean, you're the next person I'm hitting up to be a guest blogger.)

bcg@bonniegrove.com

Be brilliant. People are watching.