Monday, February 26, 2007

A wireless network is not always a good thing ...

I'm not really here, I'm writing a plot skeleton. Although that whole family is starting to get on my nerves ...

for those of you who are feeling left up in the air (oh look I made a funny) about whether or not I made it to Glen Eyrie ...

Yes I did. And when I'm not prowling around the castle opening doors and trying staircases, I'm walking around the grounds with my eyes glowing. Add to that the fact that I'm surrounded by real people who are also writers, and I'm learning tons and all I have to say is:

It's a lucky, lucky life some days.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

ok so I have a few minutes between flights

(although "between" implies that I've actually gotten on an airplane by this point, but no, I just got up at FOUR THIRTY in the morning for fun. And so I could see the deer. Because deer are magic)

Either Michelle or Linda (please forgive me for not digging through the comments to find out) wanted to know where I was going. As far as I know, I'm still going there, although in my apparently flawed plans, I was supposed to be in the air between Denver and Colorado Springs by now - thank goodness I was planning to be there mega-early, okay hang on, where was I? oh yes, where am I going?

let me just point out to you to you that two of the presenters are Angela Hunt and Kathryn Mackel, both of whose books I have recommended on this very blog.

Ok the laptop battery is dying - bye kids :)

Sunday morning 5 am

Last week, at Awana, during story-time, we were talking about miracles. I looked out at their lovely little faces and whispered conspiratorially "God? is MAGIC."

I'm ready to go. I've had a lovely long soak in the tub, gotten dressed in the half-dark, shaken my sleeping sweetheart and whispered "God and I are going on a great adventure!" I've woken the kids up and kissed them good-bye as requested.

The puppy stirs when I come downstairs and I pick her up and kiss her head and decide to take her out for a quick sniff of the bushes, just once before I go. I open my front door, and three white tail deer bound away from my front yard. I stand on the quiet dark street, watching their tails waving like flags as they pick their way daintily down the cul de sac towards the park.

Magic, indeed.

Friday, February 23, 2007

But wait! there's more!

I got a wee bonus the other day, because it's Performance Review time, but because of Things I Won't Mention Because I Don't Know What They Are, we got the bonuses before our performances were actually reviewed.

TechnoGuy looked at it and said "Wow. Severance pay really sucks these days."

Thursday, February 22, 2007

I'll be out of town, but I've missed posting for 5 days before so you won't even notice it

I'm going away to a Christian writer's workshop in Colorado for 5 days and I am very excited and I can barely let myself think about it even though I am leaving IN THREE MORE SLEEPS because I have NEVER done anything remotely similar to this but even though I prayed and prayed about whether or not I should go, God didn't tell me to stay home - where was I? oh yes I can barely let myself think about it because I get all goofy and silly and excited and my children are insulted by the fact that I could be so delighted when they are not coming with me and did I mention it is in a CASTLE and they are also annoyed that I could consider staying at a castle without them and does anyone know if there's snow in Colorado Springs at this time of year???
THREE MORE SLEEPS and also it is KILLING TechnoBoy the Travel Freak to be the one staying home but even though he tried thinking up many "I'll drive you there" and "oh wait that won't work why don't we just come and pick you up" scenarios, none of them were practical or indeed even feasible so he can't come and his head might explode when I get on the airplane without him so pray it's not too messy, okay? and I will take many pictures and I will write pages and pages about Brynn and Rowan because merciful freaking heavens I don't even know if he meets her when he takes the bowls to the healer's house or not and lo, I am stuck but did I mention this is a workshop and there will be HOMEWORK so it's actually WRITING and not just sitting around in a CASTLE for FIVE DAYS talking about writing although that would be cool, too. And if this was my fat blog I would say that the nutritionist did not say don't eat any dessert and don't do this and don't do that, she said have a lovely time and focus on portion size and whatever it is, try it if it looks interesting because you don't cook like that at home and do try to go for a walk every day. And I'm going in THREE MORE SLEEPS, one of which I am going to go have, now.


Elisabeth Elliot once replied to a letter from someone bemoaning her lack of self-esteem with this sentence:

"Who came up with this self-esteem notion?" She goes on to say, basically, get over yourself, and the first time I read this, several years ago, it bothered me, as I was just moving out of the phase in my life where I thought I was second-best, and I couldn't understand her objection. I think I get it now.

When we say "I am amazing! I can do (whatever it is)!" we are outwardly fixing the thing that keeps us ineffective (primarily self-deprecation) but we are not fixing the root problem. I lead a ladies Bible study on Tuesday mornings. The best studies I have are not the ones where I say to myself ahead of time "I'm good at this. I'm good with people, I am capable of establishing great rapport and blah blah blah I am all that and a bag of chips." The most successful studies are not the ones where I get up in the morning and say "I suck at this, everyone hates me, I'm too fat for anyone to take seriously, and my jeans look stupid on me."

The best ones are the ones when I get up in the morning and pray "Lord, help me to park my ego." And that's ego in both directions - loving myself and hating myself - two sides of the pride coin. With a "park my ego" attitude, I keep my eyes and ears open, and I am much more likely to be tuned to anything God might be whispering about who needs what from whom that day.

The fix for hating yourself is NOT learning to love yourself. It's learning to be who you are before God, good points and bad points, finding out what you've been given to do (diapers, housework, a 9 to 5 job, smile at the cranky woman on the bus, write books or songs or poems) and just do it. And ask God for help doing it, because no matter how much you like or hate yourself, He knows more than you do. Michael Card, well-known singer/songwriter/writer said at a concert once "Bear with me, I just wrote this song, so I don't know it very well." He fiddled with the strings a bit and looked up again. "You should always do what you're not good at - otherwise you think it's you."

I'm not worthless. I'm not incredible. I have good points and bad points and dwelling on either of them overmuch is not going to change that.

And one of my current bad points is I can't seem to find a way to end this post without going back and making my point, which I have already made ...pretend I said something pithy and just slightly Elisabeth Elliot "right to the heart of the matter" ish, will you? And I will go post on my fat blog, and go up to my ordinary bed and get some sleep :)

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

My dog is SO the smartest

She's figured out, all by herself, that if she gives her best "Timmy's down the well*" bark and wags her tail at you, you will think she has to pee, and you will be right, and she will be so pleased at how bright you are, she will want to give you a treat.

*she did the Timmy thing the other night because she thought she heard someone in our driveway and I finally had to open the front door with my pocket dog under my arm and tell her "Look. No Timmy, no well. Pipe down already." So then she Timmied (I just made up a verb!) the door to the garage as well, so I did the same thing there. If Timmy is ever really down a well, he'll get no help from me, what with all the crying wolf this mutt** is doing.

**She's a horrible dog. I hate her, what with all the friendliness to everybody and running through the snowdrifts facefirst so that she ends up with a muzzle covered in ice, and all that happy leaping about any time I come home after an extended absence*** - I just post about her now and then because she WILL learn to read and I don't want her to catch on how to annoying she is, what with all the whining just to sit at my feet at night and manipulative nonsense like that.

***ie more than five minutes

Why it's hard to be a 12 lb dog in Calgary right now

all your favourite places to *ahem* relieve yourself are covered in snow that is higher than your head.

And here's why it's hard to be a 12 lb dog's owner in Calgary right now.

The dog will be so desperate to drop a load that she will run frantically down the sidewalk, at the end of her leash, looking for ANYWHERE that smells right* that's not hidden under 2 feet of snow, and you will have no choice but to run after her, even if you are wearing running shoes and no socks and have no mittens on and your jacket is hanging wide open and it's minus freaking 24 freaking Celsius out there, because - here is your Achilles heel - you're a bit stopped up yourself, and you feel her pain.

*that's another Dogs are Kinda Stupid moment right there - what is the smelling about? Just GO ALREADY.

Shouldn't you be working? I should be.

I had to work late last Thursday so I called A and got her to put the roast in the oven. It was the first time she'd gotten up close and personal with a huge hunk of raw meat.

As she was setting the table, she announced that she was going to become a vegetarian. As I was readying my soapbox, she shook her head.

"Wait, that won't work. I HATE vegetables!"


(from She Who Posts in Fits*)

So I'm taking a poetry class because I want someone to force me to write poetry, because nothing summons the creative muse like a gun held to your head. For this week's offering, I needed to find a fresh image for sense of unfinished waste you get when someone you love dies. I asked my family to think up some things that wouldn't get finished if a person died. I got blank stares from the Y chromosomes, and the other X carrier got very thoughtful. Half an hour later, she said:

"Well I thought of something but I don't want it to sound stupid."

I coaxed and she finally whispered:

"well it's like a window that shatters before the last piece of glass can be fitted in."

Now that they've all left ...

I gave them all pastrami sandwiches. I don't expect any of them will like it. I will cheerfully be wrong about this.

Here's what I expect.

Child X: WHAT was that TERRIBLE meat??

Child Y: Umm. Sorry I didn't eat ALL my lunch, but I didn't really love that meat you put in there.

Spousal Unit: Thanks for the lunch! For my part, you wouldn't need to make sandwiches with whatever kind of meat that was again.

Also ...

Why did I ever start that whole "get here in time to eat, I'll give you bacon" nonsense?

Why won't it stop snowing?

February sucks. My dad died in February. My granddad died in February. My mother nearly died a few February's ago - two nights ago, I dreamt I was at my grandfather's funeral and I couldn't stop crying because I wanted my dad to be there. And I woke up feeling like I'd been crying all night.

Now that I've cheered you all up, I'm going to fry the @#$@#$@ bacon.

under "Things I'll Find Funny When They're Much Older, and You'll Find Funny Now (Maybe)"

Wow, am I tired.

3 am. There is a child in my room telling me sleep eludes them.* I offer to go lie down with them. The offer is accepted, I stumble down the hall, fall into bed, close my eyes. 30 secs later someone THWAPS me. "WAKE UP!!"

This particular child does not want the company of a sleeping person in the wee small sleepless hours of the night. This particular child wants you AWAKE. This particular child may wake you up upwards of 5 times before succumbing to sleep themselves, by which time you are asking yourself if you're keeping them up, what with all the beating up of parents they seem to be required to perform.

Also, I'm tired.

*Possibly not their wording

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Might as well be living in Winnipeg

It's cold and I'm cranky and I don't know what to cook for supper, but the dog has a cute topknot on her head, thanks to Amy who is "cleaning her room".

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Adventures in Sewing

(aside: does anyone ever look at the Blogger options in the upper right of this screen and think of Meatloaf? (was it Meatloaf?) whoever it was, I don't think blogs are paradise)

Okay so a friend at work just had the great good fortune of giving birth (in what even she refers to as a ridiculously fast labour) and I was madly sewing yesterday so I could bring her a present and hold a tiny boy for a while.

We have a big house. Three floors of available space.

B decides to come and do his homework under the table I'm sewing on. A decides to join him, they decide to build a fort, suddenly in this massive house there is a big construction project going on less than three feet away from me. I finally convince them to move.

I have my sewing machine on one table and my serger behind me on another, so all I have to do is swivel to switch machines. I'm topstitching, so I hit the presser foot on the sewing machine, and the serger roars to life. I leap like I've been shot, (B told me later he thought "Whoa! how are you doing that??") and look under the table.

My 12 lb dog has dragged her brandnew round bed under the table, on top of the presser foot as is lying on it, wagging her tail at me, while the serger rattles away sewing ...nothing.

I eventually got it done and delivered and oh my was it sweet to be holding somebody so brand new to this world. And now I get to go to work and tell everyone I got to hold him first :)

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Sorry to do this, hope it's temporary

Due to an annoying deluge of Anonymous comments on ancient posts, I'm going to have to disallow Anonymous commenters for awhile.

Hopefully I can do that for a week and it will go away.

Okay wait I'll stick in that annoying word verification thingummy and see if that stops it.

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Hockey Night In Canada

(brought to you by the child B)

Toronto Maple Leafs versing Ottawa Senators

At the end of the second period, the score was 2 - 0 Maple Leafs, and then in the third period, Ottawa Senators scored a power play goal. And about 9 minutes into the third period, Ottawa scored again. And so we saw the overtime and no-one scored, so then we went into the shoot out, and the Maple Leafs won the shoot out. The end.

Flames versing Canucks

In the first period, Henrik Sedin and Daniel Sedin scored and then they striked back again.

In the second period, the Calgary Flames scored to make it 2-1 and Dian Phaneuf took a slapshot and hit Luongo between the shoulder and his cheek, and then Luongo fell down as soon as it hit him there, but he still played the game. And then Christian Huselius just got ROBBED by Roberto Luongo. So Luongo fell down and Christian Huselius went to the other side and somehow Roberto Luongo saved it. And then after a while the Flames scored again and then they tied it up 2-2.

In the third period, Brian Ritchie scored to make it 3-2 and then Roberto Luongo got pulled and then the Canucks had six attackers and it went off Pyatt into the net. and then the Calgary Flames went over to the Canucks net and scored on the empty net, and the Flames won 4-3.

First star is Dian Phaneuf.
Second star is Alex Tanguay.
Third star is Pyatt.

The end.