Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Monday, August 29, 2005

We should all have such a burden

B is angry with me for asking him to bring the guinea pig food in from the van, so he is out there stomping around and ...

weeding the garden.

Apparently the house is clean enough.

Why not? Lizards grow new tails

So why is it, exactly, that I have to go and see my doctor in order to get a refill of a hormone replacement? They used to phone in refills, and bill me. I was fine with that, because the doctor is halfway across the flippin' city, but I've been seeing her for 15 years and I'm reluctant to switch. I can understand wanting to see me periodically for medication of a medical problem, but for ESTROGEN? Is there some suspicion that I will have regrown all my reproductive organs and will no longer be in need of those missing hormones? It's a complete waste of my time, and my doctor's time. She won't even have time to sit down.

"Hi, what can I do for you?" she'll ask.

"I need a refill on the HRT" I'll say.

"Well here you go! Arent' you glad you drove 25 minutes, sat in my waiting room for half an hour, and then waited in this examining room for another 15 minutes just for that? Have a lovely drive home! Hope rush hour isn't too annoying for you!"


I may have to take back some of my ranting against the US Insurance for the Healthy system.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

This explains a lot

so last night, after One of Those Days here in stay-at-home Mom land, TechnoHero took the kids for a bike ride so I could clean up the kitchen in peace.

So I checked my e-mail, read a few blogs, had a long phone conversation with my mother, created a few blog entries of my own, and googled the phrases "Fray Chek" and "tricky pickle".

Nuff said.

Friday, August 26, 2005

And speaking of tricky pickles ...

If I never do the dishes, and I *have* done the laundry quite recently, how can I be out of clean tea towels?

I know words are supposed to be my weapon of choice ...

but I'm stymied as to how to describe the sound of a guinea pig's sneeze. Not that I need to, but if I did - it's a problem. A sticky wicket, as they (reputedly) say across the Pond, or a tricky pickle, as they say at work. (you can see why I love the place)

How many x-rated spammers am I going to get, now that I've used the phrase "tricky pickle", do you think?

so I have this computer game ...

with this adorable little chunky panda running all over the place, hiding from bad guys, or trapping them, collecting lanterns and running out the exit, and some levels have a cave that he backs into, and it magically accomodates his bulk and all you see is two little eyes and some really confused cranky little guys looking for him and today? I WANT A CAVE. Or a trap.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Well knock me over with a laptop

I found the poem! Scrawled on a piece of paper stuffed in the back of a notebook in my laptop case!!

Colour me "happy camper". (what colour would that be, do you think?)

Of all the things I've l*st, I miss my mind the m*st

Okay that's a lie. Of all the things I've lost, I miss two things the most - a poem entitled "Since You Died" ...arguably, since I wrote it, I should be able to recreate it. I've been trying to figure out an ending for it for approximately six years (what year is it? what year did my Dad die?) and I finally got it a few months ago, and now I can't find the rest of the poem. It's making me crazy.

What's making me crazier, however, is the loss of all my preliminary notes for the novel I'm going to write while I'm off work for a few months. You can't turn the house upside down looking for an electronic file. (Glasses are easier. I found mine under my computer desk after an hour of searching yesterday. I finally went and got the guinea pig out of his cage so that I would have a reason to talk calmly and reasonably as I wandered half-blind around my house trying to find my glasses so I could see better to find my glasses.) This whole novel thing is mildly annoying anyway - I've got this woman wandering around my head, nagging at me to write her down, and I keep telling her I'm a poet, and she should go away. And she completely ignores me. Now I'm telling her I've lost ALL MY NOTES and she just shrugs. Apparently that's MY problem and not hers, and she's not going away until I start the ruddy book.

Hmm. Maybe I have lost my mind after all.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Garden Tidbit

I love my garden. It's sort of weedy and hodge-podgey and random but there's lots of blooming flowers and it's very colourful when you drive by. B has been weeding and watering this week, the little darling. Tomorrow I might weed and water, except if it rains, in which case I will do laundry. I don't have to work for a few months, and I'm rather tickled. However this post is not about that. This post is about this:

HEY!!! Friend who gave me the daylilies! One of them bloometh!

to budding songwriters everywhere

Don't try to rhyme "Kilimanjaro" with "tomorrow". Someone has already gotten away with that one.

Monday, August 22, 2005

Awwww Question of the Day

B, with a gigantically fat lip after an altercation with an uncarpeted stair: "Will my real lip come back?"

And just as I'm typing this, he came in with a bag of baguettes I just bought: "Are these to make lonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng sandwiches?"

And A left me an extremely precious note last night while MusicFreak* and I were out at a concert, but she's asked me not to talk about why. Let me just say that it made me want to scoop her out of her bed and cuddle her all night long.

*this is a rhyming slang nickname for TechnoGeek - there was nothing Techno about him last night. It was a bit frightening, all in all.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

But wait! before I go to bed ...

Dear Spammers:

How do you know a T-shirt is sent from heaven? Does it tell you? Does it have miraculous powers? If not, how do you know it wasn't thrown out an airplane window? And how many did you get? Are T-shirts from heaven a common experience in your life?

Colour me skeptical.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Sewing Update #2

Machines off, dust covers on (oops hang on a sec - ok now they're on) machines unplugged, presser feet hidden (I have a six year old with a passion for machinery and hands-on involvement) - two outfits laid out nicely on the back of the couch.

What took the longest? Altering B's pants because I thought he needed more "rise" and so I gave him more and he put them on and said "I don't like puffy!!" And indeed, they were puffy, and the fiddling began.

Also the nifty-neato, surprising cheap iron-on Austrian crystal decal - it took an inordinately long time for me to figure out "let cool for 2 minutes" meant "let cool for 2 minutes" and that any peek I snuck ahead of time just to see if it really worked was ripping the crystals off because the glue hadn't dried. And really - it doesn't take boatloads of patience to wait TWO MINUTES.

And now I'm going to bed while it's still today.

Sewing Update

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mildly mystifying conversation

Child: "Mom, can we play inside? I'm cold."

Me: "Yes, but you could just put on a jacket."

Child: "Okay, I'll put on a jacket."

(interval while child finds jacket)

Child: "Mom? Can you come and help me take off my shirt? I don't want to get too hot."

Huh? Would you believe I actually bothered to ARGUE for a few minutes about how much sense that made? And then the phrase "choose your battles" popped into my brain, and I helped with the shirt removal.

Things Going Through My Head As I Cheerfully Serge the Right Front to the Left Back, Wrong Sides Together

The guinea pig should be thanking me, not bolting for cover when he hears me come up the stairs. How else would he have been motivated enough to learn how to sign "I am not thirsty. Seek professional help."????

TechnoSchnozz snores far too much.

Why can't they invent a cell phone that will stop beeping when I holler "I know Ronni tried to call, but thanks for letting me know" at it from across the room?

Why are there so many tree names in the book I haven't started writing yet? Why is one forest benign and the other sinister? Why does Rowan choose to leave? Why doesn't Ash? Who gives a rat's patootie?

Back to the pants. oh and a wee tip:

don't take the lid off the bottle of Fray Chek with your teeth, dab the noxious substance on the garment, and then put the bottle back on the lid, lest you miss the lid altogether and snort Fray Chek up your nose, because this? WILL hurt.

Quick questions

Why did I suggest four pockets, two of them with flaps, on these pants????

Why did I think I was going to get all this done before Tuesday and still sleep at night?

Why can't my mother-in-law relate to staying up sewing until 4 a.m.?

Guest poster, cause I'm sewing

I just found this note buried under the hay. I think he's waiting for a chance to throw it in the toilet, in hopes that it will reach the sea:

"The woman in this house has lost her mind. She's convinced I can't find my new water bottle, even though the daft cow hung it exactly where the old one was, so now she comes up the stairs twice a day, holds me squirming against the water bottle and squeezes on the water bottle. GET ME OUT OF HERE."

it's signed "Snowflake the Beleaguered"

He doesn't have to worry, however. I just heard him drinking from his new water bottle. My diligence has paid off.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Progress Report

puttered and muttered all day, one outfit cut out and sewn, however, this is just the "okay I'll make him some pants out of THIS and a shirt out of THIS just to see if I'm sewing the right size" (he could use an inch or so on the pants, two inches length on the shirt, in case you're curious) The finished outfit is made from Boston Red Sox fabric. I have no idea why, because he's not a baseball fan and we've never been to Boston. Maybe it was the gigantic "B"'s that enthralled him ...

So now it's 5 o'clock and I'm going to get started on the REAL sewing. Thank goodness TechnoMamma'sBoy begged his mother to cook him dinner just once while she was here.

A bientot. (add special characters as necessary)

A.W.O.L.

Kids go back to school Tuesday. Mother (i.e. me) sewing new clothes for first day of school because they're still letting me do it. Have patterns and fabric and that's IT. Also have 7 extra people here.

No sweat. Just no blogging. While you're waiting, here's some pics from OTHER First Days.

Okay never mind, apparently I *can't* get that to work at the moment.

Pics on Tuesday, as I'm sobbing my way through my day.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My mother in law just called and she and her new husband are going to be here for supper, even though we were quite sure they weren't coming.

HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oooh good one!

"There are a thousand thoughts lying within a man that he does not know until he takes up a pen to write." William Makepeace Thackeray

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Because Heather said I would

So last night around supper time, my SIL and her husband and three girls arrived for a visit. A had been invited by a friend to a VBS that sounded like so much fun, she talked her cousins into going along with her. "And you dress up every day!" she enthused. "Tomorrow is 50's wear! And my Mom is sewing me a circle skirt!" Indeed, I had promised. Thankfully Heather is also a sew-er, and after supper we went downstairs and dug through my BestOfIntentions fabric stash, and then we stayed up until 1:00 in the morning tossing circle skirts from serger to sewing machine and back again and lo and behold, look what we did! I don't know who was more pleased - all those matching cousins, or Heather and I, that our growing-up-far-too-fast children still wanted us to sew for them. Even B had to get in on the act, although he wasn't exactly vintage 50's. He *matched*. (You'll notice a theme shift when you get to the youngest child - she saw one particular remnant and chirped "That has VEGGIE TALES on it! That's MINE." And so it is.)

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Tag!

In lieu of actually thinking about what to post about summer colds and sunburns, I'm going to pretend I got tagged over at either Fumbling For Words or CCAP's Life.

What I was doing 10 years ago today:
Approximately ten years ago today, TechnoBoy asked me to go away for the weekend without knowing where we were going. Huge reach for me, but he so loves surprises that I agreed to it. We spent a weekend camping towards Spokane, where we went to a John Denver concert in the park. Now I realize there are some of you who wouldn't cross the street for that kind of music, much less go to another country, but it's the music we fell in love to, 25 years ago, and I have few finer memories than sitting outside under the stars listening to John Denver. On the way home (we drove all night in order to get to work on time the next day) I realized that for the first time in probably five years, I had not once ached to have a child with us. For the first time in five years, I had a glimpse of what a contented life without children would be, and for the first time in five years (or more) I believed it was possible. A week or two later, we met A's birthmother.

What I was doing 5 years ago:
Umm umm umm. August 2000. Bet I was hot. Sometime this month I was walking my firstborn (anal-retentive Poet pops in to say .."umm ...born?" Shut up, Anal Retentive Poet) to kindergarten for her first day. Probably right about now I was crying. I cried the whole month before she went to school. I'm much better now - it's usually just the last week before school starts, and even then, I only cry once or twice. Usually I just drive by the school, giving it black looks and muttering "Whose kids ARE they, ANYWAY?". I also break into mournful song at supper time - either Turn Around or Slippin' Through My Fingers. The children, basking in being thus treasured, leap to their feet and clamp their hands over my mouth, shrieking all the while. It's very moving.

What I was doing 1 year ago:
Being bitten by a mosquito. This is Canada, isn't it?

What I was doing Yesterday:
Cooking pancakes at a picnic table, and hanging out at Miette Hot Springs. Chatting up a woman in a nice bathing suit (aside: ever notice how many people look really BAD in a bathing suit? This woman didn't, and I felt compelled to tell her.) We had a lovely chat, and I managed to hide my shock when she told me the gray haired man I had assumed was her father was her husband. They had the liveliest two year old on the planet. The only moment of peace either one of them had all day was down by the picnic tables, later, where I saw them all seated eating sedately, with the curly haired angel firmly strapped into his car seat, throwing food at them.

What I will be doing Tomorrow:
Going to church and hanging out with my family. Seeing how my flowers are doing after a week away. Picking up the guinea pig. Letting my SIL and her family in ;)

5 Snacks I enjoy:
Sigh. Always with the food. Doritos, crab-flavored pollock on toast, bits of cheese, popcorn, saltines and butter.

5 Adult Beverages:
Don't like the taste of alcohol.

5 bands I know the lyrics to:
I'm taking creative license with the term "band". Billy Joel, Michael Card, Abba, John Denver, Randy Stonehill

5 Things I would do with $100,000.00:
Buy a tiny impractical car that I likely wouldn't even fit into, pay off some debt, take a long holiday somewhere I've never been, take TechnoBoy to Paris for a weekend, get the backyard landscaped

5 Locations I would run away to:
HongKong, London, Vienna, Venice, the Netherlands (they have separate traffic lights for the BIKE PATHS. With little red, yellow and green BICYCLES)

5 Bad habits I have:
Blogging instead of sleeping, asking my kids to do things I could do for myself, moaning about being overweight while drinking Coke, procrastination, burping out loud when I think I'm alone

5 Things I love doing:
Blogging instead of sleeping, writing, reading, laughing, praying

5 Things I would never wear:
anything gree - oops. Except those green clothes I now own ...okay but really. A bikini, a nose ring, nipple clamps, false eyelashes, 17 ear-rings in one ear.

5 TV shows I like:
Without A Trace (because I like that old guy's face - it's interesting) er (especially when they forget themselves and get all medical on us) THE AMAZING RACE, that Xtreme games thing from some other country where they have to do stupid things and the voiceover is so far from funny it's hilarious, Dharma and Greg (I don't care if it's still on or NOT)

5 Movies I like:
Amelie, Chocolat, The Very Long Engagement, The Princess Bride, The Gods Must Be Crazy

5 Famous People I would like to meet:
Well a) define famous and b) Michael Card, Angela Hunt, Oprah, Patricia McKillip, Anne McCaffrey

5 Biggest joys at the moment:
Making B laugh, finding out what A is thinking (its always something, and it's rarely predictable) gardening, my job, TechnoBoy

5 Favourite toys:
sewing maching, computer, BopIt, the New Car (even though I refuse to drive it) the GPS software on TechnoBoy's laptop

5 people I tag:
Whoever wants to.